Embracing Emotions Single Mothers Fear
Recently, I asked ChatGPT a set of three questions: “What emotions are single mothers avoiding? Why are they avoiding them? And what would Ula Friedel have to say about that?” The response offered an insightful starting point for reflecting on the experiences of single mothers. Here’s how ChatGPT answered, combined with my own perspective and the insights I’ve gained through my work.
What Emotions Are Single Mothers Avoiding?
ChatGPT suggested that single mothers may avoid confronting certain emotions, such as:
Guilt – Feeling guilty about not being able to provide everything for their children or not meeting societal expectations.
Shame – Stemming from societal stigma or personal insecurities about their relationship status or perceived failures.
Anger or Resentment – Directed toward an absent partner or circumstances that have placed them in a challenging position.
Grief – Over the loss of a partner, relationship, or a vision of the family they once imagined.
Fear – About the future, financial stability, or their ability to meet their children’s needs.
These emotions are deeply human and common in the experience of single mothers, but they are often avoided for reasons ChatGPT also highlighted:
Why Are These Emotions Avoided?
According to ChatGPT:
Overwhelming Responsibilities
Single mothers are often preoccupied with meeting daily demands, leaving little time for self-reflection.
Fear of Vulnerability
Confronting emotions might feel like opening a floodgate they cannot manage.
Perceived Weakness
Many feel societal or self-imposed pressure to remain strong for their children.
Lack of Support
Without emotional or professional support, they may not know how to address these feelings effectively.
These answers resonated with me and provided a strong foundation. But as someone who has walked this path, I wanted to build on this and share my perspective.
What Single Mothers May Be Avoiding in Life
Beyond specific emotions, single mothers often avoid certain aspects of their lives altogether. Here are common themes I’ve observed:
Self-Care and Pleasure
Single mothers might deprioritize their own needs and desires due to overwhelming caregiving duties. They often feel guilty for indulging in activities purely for themselves.
Emotional Healing
Many avoid addressing past relationship trauma or unresolved feelings, focusing solely on their children or day-to-day survival. Yet, unhealed emotions can resurface in unexpected ways.
Vulnerability in Relationships
Fear of rejection, judgment, or repeating past mistakes can lead to avoidance of dating or forming close connections. The need to protect themselves and their children can make vulnerability feel like a risk.
Setting Boundaries
To avoid conflict or guilt, single mothers may struggle to establish boundaries in personal and professional settings, often leading to burnout.
Pursuing Personal Dreams
Many avoid pursuing passions, hobbies, or career growth, believing these to be secondary to their role as a parent. This suppression can lead to a sense of unfulfillment.
Asking for Help
A desire to appear strong can lead single mothers to avoid seeking support or acknowledging their struggles, perpetuating isolation and overwhelm.
My Perspective on Emotional Avoidance
Avoidance is often a coping mechanism, but it can inadvertently prevent us from living fully. Here’s how I approach this in my work:
Reconnecting with Self
Emotions are not the enemy—they are messengers. When we take the time to sit with our guilt, anger, or fear, we open the door to healing and personal growth.
Healing Practices
I guide clients through tools like somatic practices, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) tapping, and embodiment practices to release emotions stored in the body. These practices create a sense of safety and connection.
Empowerment through Vulnerability
Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s a gateway to authenticity and strength. By allowing ourselves to feel, we reclaim parts of ourselves we’ve been suppressing.
Creating Safe Spaces
I prioritise building environments where single mothers feel supported and free from judgement. This allows them to explore emotions at their own pace.
The Cost of Avoidance
Avoiding emotions can lead to burnout, disconnection, and a lack of joy. Embracing them fosters resilience, clarity, and fulfilment.
The Transformative Power of Acknowledging Emotions
When we stop running from emotions and start listening to them, we unlock our capacity for healing and joy. Imagine turning guilt into gratitude for the efforts you make daily, or transforming anger into boundaries that protect your peace. Grief becomes a space to honour the past, and fear becomes a catalyst for action.
As I often say to my clients: “You are not just surviving – you are rediscovering the radiant, empowered woman within. The journey begins when you stop avoiding and start embracing your whole self.”
If you’re a single mother feeling stuck or disconnected, know that you are not alone. Acknowledging your emotions is not about fixing everything overnight—it’s about taking the first step toward healing. Let’s work together to create a life where you feel seen, supported, and empowered.